Moment of Now (Self Help IV)

Drinking too much lately

In my drunkard’s maze, the world seems colorful, and

I can feel excitement bubbling up from inside, so organic

 

Get high with music beat, at times I forget

how cacophonous life can be

If lucky, I can dance with it

 

Why do broken hearts bring out clarity and masterpiece?

When flooded in happiness, poetry doesn’t rhyme

Is being self-destructive equal to creative?

 

Answer me, Baldwin, Hemingway, Plath, Simone and Winehouse

 Will soulfulness be distilled from soulless misery?

The sonnet of the past don’t always contribute to wisdom of the future

 

If I have a smoke, that just makes me dizzy and sleepy

But it rescues me from insomnia

I am here in my mold. I can’t change, eh no  

Let me close my eyes

Just for now

 

 

Stop Whining! (Self Help III)

1.

War is ongoing

People are dying

I am SO unhappy

 

2.

Politicians are still compromising in chambers

Celebrities are still wasting at nightclubs

I am still exhausting from work

 

3.

I am tired of seeing public figures’ wives stand by their men who are Client 1 through 10

I am sick of being insulted by moral figures’ condemning homosexuals while they are harassing altar boys

I am disgusted with authority figures’ ordering massacre disguised in the name of freedom

 

Even if living everyday is a bittersweet symphony

                        Having off-key PMS will not be the solution

 

 

Emotional Diet (Self Help II)

I am overweight with sentimentality

Anxiety, depression, frustration, melancholia stuff me fully. And loneliness—

that’s some extra packed in

In faded lights, a go-go boy sweats and earns

nobody recognizes anybody, all faces are vaguely figured

I am a regular, experienced and all too familiar

with rules of the game.

Jesus and Confucius offer different options, but I know I am different--

I want an alternative.

                   Outside of the box solution. 

                                                       To burn the fat of morbidity and

                                                       gain strength of merry-go-lucky.

The go-go boy asks me to draw something on his body

I outline a star on his right nipple, the crooked little shape around that dim pink Vesuvius

It’s my love for you, Stranger

Even though you know I’ve cheated myself, you know I would

I can sweat and earn—to love and be loved